Welcome. I work with couples, singles and individuals in person and in San Diego. Get real-time actionable steps, sexual strategies, and guidance that you can apply immediately. Learn to be more sexually confident, restore what you once had, help your partner feel safe to open up and get past stagnant intimacy to get what you've been craving. This is professional, world-class intimacy consulting.



Hand sanitizer, 3 HEPA air filtration systems, safe distance, air conditioning, humidification, warmth, high air quality and restrooms.


A rain forest style view of nature with a striking floor to ceiling glass window. Soothing art, large gemstones, warm, adjustable mood lighting, a plush sofa, nature sounds, pillows, and more. 


Velvet drapery, candles, floor to ceiling mirror, essential oils, a place to stow away your purse, and your own private exit when you can’t wait to go explore what you learned!  Closeness Coaching is an experience.




$ 250

Per hour. No commitment
Up to 2 hours
  • Enormous value comes from your very first session


$ 200

More doing, less talking

Mostly demos and interactions
  • 40 minutes of intimate interactions, demos and exercises for you, or you and your partner


$ 125

Every half hour

Book 30, 60, 90, 120 minute sessions
  • Schedule as needed at your convenience


$ 225

Per hour when you commit to 4 sessions: $900 one time investment
  • Four 1 hour sessions or two 90 minute plus one 60 minute session

A $100 deposit is required to secure your first appointment over the phone.
It applies to your session fee. Change or cancel your appointment any time up to 36 hours in advance.
All cancellations or rescheduling within 36 hours of your appointment forfeits your deposit.
Payment: Cash, Venmo, ApplePay, CashApp and all major credit cards


First,we discover what is missing

The way you hold and carry yourself in intimate situations matters. Exploring body language is key for success with your partner. But we will likely need to back up a bit to find out where the pain points in your relationship are.

Do we need to unlayer some bad or old habits? Do you use language and expressions that are revolting or shocking to your partner? Are there things you're saying or doing that are massively hindering closeness with your partner?
We can transform your dialogue, tone, and communication emotional skills so that your partner actually responds to you in a way that you both find attractive. She needs to feel your calm, present, masculine energy to feel safe with you before she can open up.

Click the heading above to learn more

Next, you'll genuinely connect with your partner

Couples often think foreplay and buildup takes hours but in my office it can be done in seconds. Connection. Not with your brain but with your energy and intention. Not calculating and logically thinking: "What trick or move can I do to get sex." You open her with presence and intention. How's your breathing? Your eye contact? Using your senses to feel, sense, touch, and savor your partner, I'll teach you all about the domain of the erotic and how to fan the flames of desire.
Eroticism can't flourish in the suffocating space of control, mechanical movement, silliness or overbearing dominance. I'll teach you how to use humor and assertiveness properly so that the encounter can breathe and open up.

Then explore with sensual, or connected touch

Teasing. Playing. Exploring, looking, touching and feeling. Does she like the slow build up or for things to progress quickly in the intimacy department? Most women want to start slow then ramp up to the perfect intensity that drives them wild. Some women are calibrated to crave more intensity while others love to be teased endlessly. I teach and prepare you for all of that as well as how to express healthy levels of dominance, confidence, assertion and sexual leadership. You will also learn how to dial it back when necessary. In session you'll learn to read your partner so you know what style of connection she needs most.

Click the heading above to get a taste

Finally, follow through and move forward

When your partner feels deeply aroused by you, simply by being in your masculine presence, no words are required. You have built powerful chemistry. It's time to take what you've learned and enjoy the fruits of your labor at home for a hot and passionate evening together. Yes, chemistry can be learned and rediscovered. And yes, I can teach you how to harness it.

Contrary to what many believe, chemistry can be created from nothing. Click the link in the heading to listen to the podcast on this subject.


Closeness coaching needs to be experienced: 

Tari is THE BEST! I had been researching premarital counseling and intimacy coaching when I discovered Tari’s Closeness podcast. I was immediately hooked and thrilled to find out he offered in-person coaching. From the first communication Tari was welcoming, proactive in accommodating. My husband and I both look forward to our sessions, whether its a couples sessions or one on one. Tari has a superpower in translating my thoughts into a language my husband can understand. He has been able to dissect so many issues, anxieties and behaviors and then transform them with his exercises and expertise. We have been able to work through heavy issues (and comical issues) but always leave his office feeling happy and closer than ever!

Working with Tari has been the best investment in our marriage and myself!

Abi Gault, San Diego



Often clients who have gone through traditional forms of therapy, sex therapy, psychotherapy and marriage and family counseling, report back that the advice they received was general or bland when it comes to the granular detail that intimacy requires. I personally think therapists are a wonderful asset for our mental and emotional health, especially when seeing one on your own. But there are some subjects that may be better suited for… someone like me. 

At Closeness we can really get into it. You can share your deep, intimate, sexual thoughts, needs, fantasies, desires and truths without fear of judgement. It’s not overwhelming or too much. . I can help you get through subjects that you have never verbalized to another person outside of your relationship, or perhaps even at all. It’s amazing what getting it out and finding your truth can do to help you move towards what you want. 

 In session, I read the room, use language that you’re comfortable with and guide you and your partner in a respectful, sensual and optionally suggestive way that allows transformation to happen the night of your first appointment. 



You heard what THEY said but whaT DO YOU DO NOW?

How quickly do things turn into an argument or go south?  Do you know how to help her shift from being flustered and emotional to deeply aroused? In my office, this can often happen within seconds or minutes. Are you trying to speak to her logically and explain your side, but she winds up feeling attacked and reacts with negative emotion or resentment?  This one issue alone is responsible for so much pain between men and women.

 As your Closeness Coach, I have a rare ability to put into words that which your partner often cannot. I can actually teach you how to speak to your woman in a way that lights her up and excites her. 


   We can also mediate ultra sensitive subjects, say the words you never could, bring up and navigate topics that are too hot for the home and be a third set of eyes and ears without the verbal sparring and escalating anxiety.

Men don’t often speak subtlety and women don’t often speak logically… but I speak both languages fluently.  

When your words get lost in translation. I am your translator.



 First, we always talk, get comfortable and build trust. We make sure everyone feels safe and a relaxed. We take our time. Then, by offering you and your partner the opportunity to interact in real time with my guidance, you begin to witness an experiential change that happens at an order of magnitude greater than traditional talk only methods.

By engaging and interacting with each other in safe, sometimes flirty and consensually suggestive ways, you’ll begin to restore emotional trust and sexual attraction as well as chemistry, right before your eyes. Get real time feedback and coaching on what excites them, shuts them down, opens them up or turns them on in a safe, soothing environment. All interactions are optional, consent based and effective.  Talk only sessions are always an option and it’s always how we start each session.



 Like my get-down-to-business podcast, it does not take long to see results. You will leave your first session with a lot of new knowledge, mindset shifts and skills.

Guidance comes in the form of information and exercises you can apply as soon as you walk out the door. If something isn’t clear, we can, with everyone’s consent, show you how to get the result you’re looking for by modeling it, explaining it, or demonstrating it. A mannequin is also present if both people would like to see a demo.   

I am your personal advocate.  I take a warm, direct and sensual approach to intimacy that’s pro-women, pro-men, pro-individual and pro-pleasure.  I do not take sides. 


When sharing the most intimate parts of your life, it’s important to feel safe and know what does not happen in session. Let’s face it, we’re talking about some pretty exciting stuff here and sometimes dealing with painful emotions around sex and intimacy.

First, it’s absolutely ok for things to get a little spicy and exciting. This is after all the point of what we are doing here.  If you find yourself suddenly aroused and turned on by your partner, or it feels like your sexual chemistry is being restored, that means what we’re doing is working! 

However, no one is getting fully naked. No one takes off their underwear. Nothing messy occurs. There is no sex. Our working environment is clean, sanitary and comfortable. 

You may however feel free to touch, or kiss one another based on your comfort level. You might remove a jacket or sweater or article of clothing if you’re feeling “warm,” but we keep it classy, consensual and in good taste. 


SO What does this CLOSENESS guy know anyway?

Let’s talk about the pink elephant in the room: I am a man, helping women get in touch with exactly what they may want or need sexually, and I facilitate that journey.  At first you might be unsure or skeptical. I get it. I encourage you to read through the countless reviews on Google, Yelp, Facebook, Audible and Apple Podcasts that other women have shared. It’s not easy to share our intimate stories publicly, so the fact that these women have, speaks volumes. 


 Indecisiveness is often a part of female nature. So is not knowing yourself or wanting to know yourself better.  Many women want and expect a man to just know for them.  Know what to do, know how to lead, know what excites her.  

It’s not easy to communicate to your partner how to be a better or more dominant or sensual lover.

 Women generally cannot and do not want to teach their partner the emotional or sexual intelligence piece that’s missing from so many relationships today

If that sounds a little like you, then we can do some good work together. I am well versed in all levels of traditional and non-traditional relationships and come equipped to handle all level of desires with regards to sexual interactions. Interestingly it’s almost always the woman who is ready for more, wants more, can handle, more! Yes sometimes you may be dealing with a block, or feeling stuck in your head,  but often times there are things a man is or isn’t doing that prevent intimacy from occurring. 

Also, sessions don’t need to be all about sex. You can come in to process, to work through things, express your sexual desires, or let go of anger and resentment, and get some things off your chest. YOU have to feel safe, comfortable AND excited to feel ready for sex.  I specialize in helping you get there. 

Sometimes women carry wounding or pain that makes sexual play or opening up feel difficult. You want to get closer and want to open up to your partner but your body shuts down or you get stuck in your head. I know you don’t want to feel that way anymore.  We can actually help get your needs met in a way that doesn’t feel compromising.  It is possible to work through these issues in a gentle way that gets results!  It’s even possible to do it playfully or in a fun and charming way that makes you smile and dare I say aroused, without getting triggered.


Do you stay or do you go?

Have you discovered some intimate texts or communication from someone outside of your relationship?

Or is it an affair that has been going on for years and the lying has devastated you to the core of your being?

Before we can even begin to restore what has been damaged, we need to discover what’s true.  Do you actually want to stay together? Are you open to restoring trust with your partner?

These answers may seem obvious, but they aren’t easy to answer. Not when love, family, status, lifestyle and children are involved. I will personally help you discover what is real and true so that you can make choices that serve your relationship or I can help separate you in a safe and respectful way. 

Finally, for those dealing with cheating: At the basis of betrayal is a secret arrangement.  Discovering your partners secret or indiscretions can be the most devastating experience of your life.  Whether you choose to remain together or not, I offer gentle guidance to get you through one of the most treacherous chapters of your life.  If both people are onboard, we can begin to infuse love, trust and intimacy back into the relationship. Or I can help you respectfully and safely part ways. The famous “conscious uncoupling” if you will. Whichever direction we go, I will be with you both each step of the way. 



If you’ve been involved or are currently involved in the sex work industry, such as Only Fans, Fansly, Many Vids or you make pornography, I have the experience to help you navigate your intimate or romantic life. 

If monogamy doesn’t feel right for both of you I’ve got the expertise and wisdom to make transitions easy and sometimes even fun. 

Maybe you want to move from being poly to being monogamous or the other way around. Perhaps your work has you feeling shut down or turned off to real-life intimacy and you want to waken that part of you up again. Maybe your choice of partners has been less than ideal and you want to learn to be treated right while still getting your sexual needs met. If you have a partner, maybe you’d like them to understand you or your work better in a healthy way…  The possibilities are endless to help get you back to feeling safe, valued and satisfied.  

Learn how to take your female partner from being bored and unavailable to aroused and ready.

Women are very receptive when you love them and treat them the right way. Often we are convinced that you need years, or hours of work to make things better. But if both partners are open to it, I can help you shift into a better feeling place within minutes. 



As men we rarely have a safe space to get real help. How do you learn how to actually take care of your woman, get both of your needs met and keep her turned on and excited for you?  I’ve got a remarkable ability to help bring these things out, even if it is hard at first, so that you both can get what you need. The world often doesn’t understand or have time for an emotional man.

We  are expected to know. Know how to please her, seduce her, read her, love her and have all of her pleasure zones mapped out. But what if you, like most of us, never got the map or learned how to do this any of this? Where do you go for help? Closeness gives the necessary guidance to help get her turned on by YOU and YOUR touch, in real time, so that you can be more effective and powerful in the bedroom.

Through respectful and tasteful sexual guidance, communication and demos, you will go home with a new skillset that will allow you to be more sensual, sexual and emotionally available on the first night of your appointment. Due to the nature of how sexual attraction works, I see all men with their female partner present at first so they can see the results.

How will you know it works? Because you’ll watch her respond favorably to you, right before your eyes. 

Sex, dominate, presence, assertiveness, passion, intimacy and communication: These are a learned set of skills. It doesn’t have to be as daunting as you’ve made it out to be in your head. Everyone needs this kind of help.  If you are the kind of man who can put his ego, or “alpha” mentality to the side, I’ve got some great surprises in store for you that you’re going to love. If you can be  open to learning a new skill, and be willing to put in the work, you will  have a partner who respects you more and wants to follow your lead. 

 In many ways you will learn how to become the man you want to be